Editing draft Draft two. It was a nice sunny flaming hot day at the beach with my cousins. My cousins' names were Liam, Noah, and Oliver. Liam was a nice boy that had the heart of Jesus. He really liked to help other people on the streets, not only that he also comes from a wealthy family and they are also a religious family. Noah was a boy that had a nice red mullet almost the colour of roses, he would always like to show off to other people like jumping off a bridge and doing backflips that he can’t even land in front of girls that are not even his age. When we were on the beach Noah rushed to set up our equipment. What we brang for our set up was camp chairs, snacks like chips and fruits, beach umbrella, and some sun cream in case we got burned. We were all ready to go for a swim and Noah was really excited to take off his shirt and show his abs in the water, while we were swimming Liam was still on the beach feeding the birds. We could see a shark's back fin and we were so far away from shore we started shouting for help but nobody could hear us. We tried swimming to shore but we were not really that good at swimming. We all started crying and then suddenly Liam heard us. He looked around to find where we were and straight ahead he could see us from a long distance. I forgot to tell you about Liam. Liam has these connections with other animals and sea creatures. He swam as fast as he could and in less than 2 minutes he was already holding on to us but the shark was getting closer and closer. When the shark was near us we were really panicking, Liam shouted “ calm down and swim to shore”. He swam closer and closer to the shark, he started to raise his right arm and whispered quietly and said “stop panicking you will be alright they won’t hurt you”. The shark swam away and never came back. THE END
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